The first step was to meet with my surgeon to decide what needed to be done. Due to the size of the tumor (2cm x 2.9cm) and the grade (Grade 3) etc he told me that I needed a mastectomy. No if's or but's about it. It was a long meeting because there were so many other questions that go with it. Chemo? Yes. Radiotherapy? Yes. How long will i be without a breast? About a year. When can i have a reconstruction? depends on lots of things......
We left that appointment in a total daze. I cried the whole hour and a half in the car on the way home and called my family asking them to all meet at my parents house so i could let them know what was going to happen.
I had a few decisions to make before booking in the surgery so i went home and did lots of research on the internet. My main decision was whether or not to have reconstructive surgery straight away or not. In my heart i wanted to take that option because i couldn't bear the thought of having to go so long without a breast, but my surgeon suggested otherwise. He said that if i wanted to take that option we would have to wait an extra few weeks to get it all organised and that basically i didn't have a few weeks to waste on cosmetic things and also because i was going to have to have radiotherapy that could impact the result of the reconstruction anyway because of what it does to your skin.
Decision made, mastectomy now and reconstruction later, but that could only happen once i'd been through all the treatment and given my skin and body time to heal. Surgery booked for exactly 1 week after my first meeting with my surgeon.
SURGERY - Looking back on it now (just over 12 months later) I handled the operation quite well (if I do say so myself!). Because of the drugs they use these days I was numb on my left side and therefore didn't feel all that much pain. Dr Thompson had told me before the surgery that generally patients only need panadol after the first day or two after surgery and i remember laughing saying, "yeah right, you're going to chop my boob off and you want me to just have panadol!!" but to be honest he was right. I was able to get up and have a shower the next day and although i was nervous at first because of the 2 tubs i had hanging out the side of my body, but it was good to get up and start to move around slowly because coming home to an 11 month old baby i knew that i couldn't just sit around and mope. Four days after the operation i went home.
The trip home was terrible though, i got so car sick and we had to keep stopping. At one stage we stopped at McDonalds so i could go into the bathroom because i thought i was going to be sick and on the way out I was feeling so dizzy and nausea's that i dropped my drains on the floor in the middle of McDonalds with heaps of people around. I was so embarrassed! The most frustrating part was having to come home with the drains and because it was christmas time all my doctors were on holidays so i had to rely on the community nurses to take my drains out for me. Luckily they were wonderful and i had full trust in them. The other frustrating part of the drains was the fact that it made it quite hard to pick up my daughter. My family and friends were wonderful where they helped mat and i out a lot but it was frustrating having to rely on someone else to help you put your own daughter into her cot and get her out because of the limited movement in my left arm. For some reason this really upset me after the surgery because it was a part of her routine that i enjoyed doing and couldn't do for a few weeks.
The first 2 photos below are the second day after the surgery and then my scar 3 months after surgery and to be honest it looked like this pretty much the whole time, even a few weeks after surgery which i was happy about because i really thought it would look a whole lot worse.
A helpful note for anyone reading this who is about to have a mastectomy is to take loose button down the front tops (not see-through though) for after the surgery. You'll have drains in so it helps to have a top that just goes to your waist which will allow you to carry your drains in a bag (I took one of those recycle bags that you can get from shops everywhere these days). It makes it a lot easier to manage going to the toilet etc and also hides them from your visitors! The breast cancer support team will send you a pillow for around your shoulder (like in the photo above) which helps to keep some of the pressure off your chest and I found this good to have when i was feeling sore, especially in the first few days.
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